Ruth introduced me to Michelle last Fall. Our lives interwoven in the familiarity of our Kinsman Redeemer. Ruth had Boaz, we had Jesus. The Lord knit Michelle's heart with mine as we shared stories of dreams yet to be fulfilled, prayers over brokeness and the shared fervency to be a vessel for God's glory. I know you will be inspired by her story.
Michelle has a heart for wings and their beautiful representation of God's shelter and provision. Be sure to read the end of this post to see how you can comment for a chance to win this WINGS Necklace.
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“We want to surgically remove half of your son’s brain in order to try to stop the seizures he is experiencing.”
Sitting in a sterile examining room; my arm wrapped around my precious eight year old son, Tanner, I took in the words the neurosurgeon in the white coat was stating.
Did he say remove half his brain?
The whole half?
What would that mean?
Is this really happening?
Will Tanner survive this?
Will he ever walk or talk without that much of his brain?
Will he be able to see and think?
Will he still be Tanner?
The doctor’s words hung in the air, and the pulse of my heart seemed stop beating for a moment – it was then the amazing peace of God began to wash over me slowly and I heard Him say, “I am with you.”
For many years, I have been in the habit of sitting with the Lord most mornings to soak up a portion of His Word, sometimes read a devotion and have a time of prayer - enjoying the peace and rest of His presence. I desperately needed that peace and rest now hearing this life-changing news.
Verses I had read over the years since becoming a Christian started to trickle into my mind as we walked out of the doctor’s office and drove home to continue on with the tasks of the day – the overwhelming decision looming like a dark thunder cloud off in the distance, one that you know brings a storm soon.
Should we go ahead with the incredibly intricate and potentially life threatening and life changing surgery? Or just continue to medicate Tanner for his grand mal seizures, and let his life expectancy remain at a mere 40 years of age.
I felt like a kindergartner being asked to figure out a calculus problem.
After leaving the hospital, I drove Tanner back to school where he could enjoy his routine, and a relatively normal day with his classmates – he really had no idea at his young age, the decision that loomed. Driving home, I remember noticing the other drivers and thinking, “You have no idea what I am facing right now?” Walking in the front door of my home, my first thought was to call my dad and share with him the decision we faced, but I sensed my Heavenly Father saying, “Come sit with me.” I sank down into the chair in our living room where I have my quiet times and opened up my Bible.
Lord, where do I even begin? As if the hand of God flipped the pages, I found myself reading Psalm 18 …
“ I love you, Lord; You are my strength. The Lord is my rock, my Fortress, and my Savior; my God is my Rock, in whom I find protection. He is my Shield, the Power that saves me, and my place of safety. I called on the Lord, Who is worthy of praise, and He saved me from my enemies. The ropes of death entangled me; floods of destruction swept over me. The grave wrapped its ropes around me; death laid a trap in my path. But in my distress I cried out to the Lord; yes, I prayed to my God for help.
He heard me from his sanctuary; my cry to Him reached his ears … He reached down from heaven and rescued me; He drew me out of deep waters. You light a lamp for me. The Lord, my God, lights up my darkness. … In your strength I can crush an army; with my God I can scale any wall. God’s way is perfect. All the Lord’s promises prove true. He is a shield for all who look to Him for protection.
For Who is God except the Lord? Who but our God is a Solid Rock? God arms me with strength, and He makes my way perfect. He makes me as surefooted as a deer, enabling me to stand on mountain heights. He trains my hands for battle; He strengthens my arm to draw a bronze bow. You have given me Your shield of victory. Your right hand supports me; Your help has made me great. You have made a wide path for my feet to keep them from slipping.”
From all the hospital visits to UCLA for the complex pre-surgery testing, to all the painful blood work Tanner had to endure – and as his Momma, every needle poke felt like it went into my arm.
Then, watching Tanner get wheeled into the operating room and waiting for the seemingly endless 10 hour surgery to be performed, and then the long walk to the recovery room to see how our precious son came through the surgery. I enjoyed the peace beyond all understanding
“Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus”. Philippians 4:7
Some have asked, how do you get that peace? The verse right before this one tells you the key.
“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.” Phil 4:6
Seems so simple. And beloved, it was that simple.
I didn’t worry about the situation, I prayed about it. I told God what I needed. And then I thanked Him for all He had done in my life up until then. That brought His peace. And His strength. And His rest.
It is there for you as well.
Tanner is a living miracle. He is currently a senior at Corona High School and earned a 3.0 GPA in regular classes. He plays on the high school tennis team and recently gave a speech in front of a thousand people at the opening of the exhibit he is featured in at the Chicago Museum of Science and Industry. “God is able to do immeasurably beyond what we could ever ask or imagine”. Ephesians 3:20
Giveaway ends Friday, July 30 at 10 p.m. PST
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REST is a 4-week Bible study series. This final week is Rest to Rejoicing, beginning with Yesterday's Bible Study.
View an overview of the entire series, Begin Week 1: Rest to Ransom, Begin Week 2: Rest to Reflection, Begin Week 3: Rest to Restoration or Subscribe now to receive posts via email or rss feeder.
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Today's post inspired by shared stories of Listening to God at:
